Maybe I'm A Maze

by Plaice

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1.
We come together today to remember Gabriel. Rising into heaven with his babe in arm, a sight so blinding he cast the demons away and he rose triumphant into the light. But, y'know, it was all a lie.
2.
Foremother 02:04
Don't go to bed thinking about what we said. We try and try but we're always fucking it up. The feeling is right, but the words never translate. You have to remember what your mother said. Your mother said, "We're living on the edge of a landslide, we've been holding on so long but we're fucking it up again. We're living on the edge of a landslide. All it takes is a little to set it off." There will come a time when the father will abdicate. He'll try and try but he'll falter and fuck it up. The action is right but his punches will never land. You have to remember what your mother said. Your mother said, "We're living on the edge of a landslide, we've been holding on too long and we're fucking it up again. We're living on the edge of a landslide. All it takes, all it takes, is a little time."
3.
Severed and elongated, the intestinal tract of me lies all along the edge of the garden path. Bleeding out slowly, watching the sky, I remember you telling me all this time you were the Super Recogniser. Bleeding out slowly. Watching the sky. I remember you telling me, all this time you were the Super Recogniser.
4.
Ten times we fight. Ten times we reconcile. Each night, falling into bed exhausted and limp from the evening exchange, happy for the day to be behind us and fearful of tomorrow and what it may bring. I'm low. But then again, you knew from the very first moment I'd be a burden, not just to you, but to our friends and family. Hiding in your shadow and replete with useless commentary and how it's all just a load of shit. This time you're right. In time, you're always right. We fall back into routine, exhausting the will to engage with each other. Our happiness is lost to a self-serving necessity to perform for, what exactly? I'm low again and feeling overwhelmed by a sudden urge to leave and be alone with the dark wrapped around me. Cutting through my thoughts I can hear, I can hear you say "I love you, I love you, forever for ever amen."
5.
Plastic Robin sits in a tree on polymer legs of man-made ingenuity. Plastic Robin, no song or beak, his wing as weak as his heartbeat within. Plastic Robin ooh...oooh...ahhh...Ahhhh! Plastic Robin, eternally there. "The Bird of Ayre...Plastic Robin!" Plastic Robin, outliving us all. The knife to the wall of my heartbeat within. Plastic Robin ooh...oooh...ahhh...Ahhhh!
6.
Set me down. If there's one thing I know, it's how I felt when you came along, wide eyed and lone. And I said "Are you real?". I said to myself "Are you real, the sun after midnight?". In shades of blue we covered you from head to toe, and I thought, I thought, "Are you real?". I thought to myself "Are you real?".
7.
Crow I - III 06:31
I lay still, closing my eyes in turn, in turn, in turn, watching the lace of the curtain billow in and out and in and out, and then the crow came quietly up to my face and rested on the pillow, beside me. He asked if I knew that I was close, that I was close to death. I assured him I was very much alive and showed him the workings of my insides, still beating and flowing and bloody and flowing and beating and bloody and beating and beating and flowing and beating and flowing and bloody...The Sun, The Light, The Moon, The Sea, The Land, The Sky: all folding into a nightmare of me and you receding into the distance, alone, but too far gone to see. His eye, so bright, looks into time, a sign from you is catching all my attention. The wing, the beak, the deep feeling of falling. I know I'm gone, but, still, there's you. And then it hits me like a truck. I don't know what to do. I'm trying hard to wake up. I can feel his coin on my eyes, and a whisper, "I wish you were here".
8.
Unboxing my life. Every day it goes out live. Watch me peel away and reveal my insides. Agreeing or not, it's a ruse for what we've lost and we know it. We can still remember how we can hide from things we have no control of, like this, an empty shell of wasted potential. But I know, I can still remember, I can still remember that I can't feel delight.
9.
Lovelost 03:15
I know I was in love with you, but then you went away. I broke in two. One half for you, one half for someone new. I know love left me cold and then, you had to go away. I broke in two. One half for you, one half for someone new. I know I was in love. I know I was in love. I know I wasn't.
10.
Bitcoin Fucker in the evening time, watching his stock rise, watching the world decline from the comfort of his custom PC gaming chair. The Bitcoin Fucker, he doesn't care about anything but the mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine...
11.
Holy God 03:43
I'm told it's all a lie, this difficult life. Welcome to my simulation. Pacify, repeat, until you have the seeds of an army of automatons. I'll admit it was a lie to create your life. We could be one and the same but...I don't believe in any God. They won't save you. I don't believe in all your Gods. They didn't make you. I'm told it's just a lie, this short little life. Won't you pull the plug? But, that's what living's for, to open a door for you to me. I don't believe in all your Gods. They won't save you. I don't believe in any God. They didn't make you.
12.

credits

released March 15, 2021

Made by Adam Browne
Mastered by Tony Fitz
Unmastered by Adam Browne

© & ℗ Sad Songs

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Plaice Dublin, Ireland

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